I obviously haven't written in a while, and I could make a number of excuses, but instead I'll write what I have to say, and I will hope that you enjoy it enough to forget that I have forgotten you.
I am changing a lot, and have changed a lot over the past six weeks or so, probably much like the "aging" scene in "Forever Young." It's quite unnatural.
I just got back from an intense cardio session at the gym. I told myself I wouldn't stop running on the treadmill/stairmaster until I released all of the things that were getting to me and inhibiting me from being productive and having inner- peace. Over an hour (and 400 calories) later, I finally began my cool down. For perspective, if I work out at 85% of my heart rate reserve, I work out for about 20 - 25 minutes. An hour is a long time. Perhaps this wasn't ideal on my heart, but I figured the mental stress would kill me slower and more painfully and dying there on the spot might be better anyways. So I worked some things out, and I feel much better.
I told a friend today, well, I could smoke and drink, or I could work out. So that's most likely the biggest change in my life, I work out 5+ days/week for 1 1/2-2 hours.
Second biggest change, because of my working out, I've gained 8 lbs. in a month.
Also, I am now dancing with the KSU Dance Team. I have missed dancing SO much, and I cannot express how amazing I feel after a hard practice. I'm loving it. We are working on our routine for Nationals in Daytona Beach on April 12th.
The past six weeks have made me face mortality. My roommate, Becca, and I were in a four-wheeling accident, luckily I only had bruising and a concussion. When I went to the ER after the accident, we found out my roommate had a severe Staph infection in her lymph nodes, and the doctors told her if she hadn't come into the ER within 24 hours, she would have died. I've never been so thankful for a concussion, otherwise we wouldn't have gone to the ER. Becca had pretty bad allergic reaction to her antibiotics, so that was pretty scary as well. We both have struggled getting caught up with school as we both missed school for a week. That's been pretty stressful.
Otherwise, school is going well. I'm taking 18 hours, and I'll be ready for a break when this semester is over. I'm looking for any excuse to take a semester off, though I probably won't. If I could work out the money, I'd get on an airplane to Africa tomorrow.
I'm single. That has taken a lot of stress off of me, and added new stress. Haha. I thought it would be simpler, though I'm not completely sure that it is. I am much more in control of my life and the stress, so I am enjoying that and enjoying the freedoms and free-time that I have. A lot.
Free time? Well, not really.
On Monday/Wednesday I leave for class at 9:00 AM and I don't get home until 10:15 PM. It's a long day...
When I am free, I'm picking up the piano and guitar. I'm miss making music, literally.
I'll be out of town at least five of the next eight weekends. I'll be in Memphis the 28th-5th. I'm really looking forward to that. (I'm also going to Nashville for Cooper's basketball tournament, East Tennessee to see the family/go skiing in North Carolina, Memphis, Vale, CO, and Daytona Beach.)
I turn 18 on Saturday!
Life is beautiful, and sometimes pretty ugly. And crazy.
Love,
Caroline
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2 comments:
oh, hooray! i've missed your writing. 1) that's a lot of working out 2) congrats on the weight gain 3) hoorah for the dancing 4) so happy both you and your roommate are ok, that's an incredible save 5) i wish I could make life sound as interesting as you do (plus yours seems to be more eventful than mine anyways) 6) and I wish i could see you!
<3
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